I can't write this blog without writing about the most recent and special day of my life, our wedding.
The lead up to the wedding was everything from hugely exciting to emotionally triggering, but I made the decision right at the start to not get stressed. I believe we all have choices about how we see things, what we allow to trigger us, and stress is a story given to us so often by others, I see it like a package that one person hands to the other and we can choose to either take it or refuse it, I refused it. This was going to be the best time of my life and I was going to enjoy all the challengers sent to me on the way.
It's amazing how many people would literally tell me I should be stressed, "why aren't you more stressed" would be a regular question, like it was wrong to not be sitting crying at night and screaming at people in the day.
Don't get me wrong there were times when buttons were pushed, but instead of being taken on the story I would head off for a bit breathe and find another solution, another way around that tried to keep everyone calm and on track.
The other trigger for me was being the centre of attention, believe it or not I'm not the most confident of people especially in front of a crowd and my initial go to pattern is the assumption that people are judging me and putting me down, so I did a lot of work with myself on this, I meditated daily about letting go of my fears and embracing love, I carried a lot of crystals around with me to help keep me grounded and my heart open and I watched my reactions closely, I wrote a script of how I saw the day going and read it daily, visualising how I would feel and working with my own emotions to stay calm. I never thought of what could go wrong, I believe in what you put out you get back, so every thought and action was a positive one. I trusted that it was all going to be ok, I had plans for all types of weather and knew whatever happened it was meant to happen and it would be ok.
I know that if I had got married 5 years ago or more our wedding would have been very different, none of these tools would have been available to me and I'd have done exactly what I thought everyone else wanted rather than what we wanted, I'd have smiled throught he day but felt uncomfortable at every step and I'd have looked back and scene a different girl rather than a women.
For me the wedding had to be like my yoga classes, about love and nature.
From the moment we got engaged under the full moon in December our wedding was always going to be a deep connection to nature and the place we find peace.
We are blessed to walk these meadows daily and find our connection not only to them but to ourselves and each other. The choice to commit our love to one another in this space was easy, and the date was what I dreamed of, the weekend of the full moon in June, 6 full moons after we were engaged.
I’ve never followed the norm, and so it was always going to be a wedding with a difference, I’m a wild hippy with my feet rooted in the earth and Tim is the same.
Water is our place of healing so to have the opportunity to marry on the bridge over the river Deben was a huge and powerful moment, there was never any question that our animals wouldn’t be involved as they are our family and a huge part of our daily lives.
I always wanted to do a yoga session to start the day off grounded and to share it with all my friends was so special, it left me feeling ready for the day connected and alive.
The day was so perfect and so deeply us that we can’t quite believe it was our day, our true dream wedding. From the animals to the surroundings and everyone involved it was a true celebration of love and life in every way.
So now all there is for you too see it, this amazing video was captured by Mike from Cinematic Keepsakes.
Thank you all for supporting us, for coming with me on this journey.